Mom made it to 90!


I am so glad that my MIL came down to visit us several weeks ago. Since the divorce  of one of her sons a few years ago, and half of the family moved to Nevada, we stopped having holiday meals together. And due to  all of her 'phobias' she wouldn't ride on the freeway. This time, however, her grandson, who had been visiting every other month or so insisted that he drive her to see both us, and her daughter who lives fairly close to  us. You see, she was diagnosed with inoperable esophageal cancer several months ago, and was told by her doctor to "get her affairs in order." That is what her grandson was helping her to do.

When I saw her in the house she looked good, though she had started to lose weight in that way the very old do, as their bodies begin to shut down. But her voice was perky as ever, as she and DH talked of this and that, and as they went over some of the things she brought that she thought he might want. Then she decided to take us to lunch, and when I saw her in the light of day I realized that the end had to be near. It was patently obvious that her liver was shutting down. I have never seen anyone so jaundiced.

 Apparently, she only had a couple days of discomfort where she just didn't feel well. I think that is a blessing. Also, she made it to 90! She died two days after her birthday.

Her daughter was also quite glad to see her.  She herself has been too weak to drive, and was herself admitted to the hospital on Christmas Eve after a fall at home.  The plan  was to release her back to her home and get her set up with hospice care; her daughter lives with her and has been carrying the burden of trying to do it all by herself. I think the hospice care will be a Godsend. I know it was with each of my parents. By the looks of her, I don't think she has six months left.

And that is how I will end things for 2012. Remember to tell the ones you love that you LOVE them, and if you live with them, tell them every day.

Good Night, TTYL, and Be Well,


Comments

  1. MuffieJanuary 1, 2013 at 8:30:00 AM PST

    Webster, a sad time for your families, I'm sure. You're in my prayers. May the new year be kinder.
    Peace,
    Muff

    ReplyDelete
  2. kmilyunJanuary 1, 2013 at 10:14:00 AM PST

    Something about this time of year finds me remembering those who are no longer with us. A year or so ago we started ending all phone conversations with those we love with "I Love You" I think it is a simple phrase that holds a lot of meaning.

    As you remind remembering to say it everyday to those you live with.

    ReplyDelete
  3. AmiJanuary 1, 2013 at 12:09:00 PM PST

    It's good that you were able to spend time with her. Happy 2013.

    ReplyDelete
  4. Elephant's ChildJanuary 1, 2013 at 1:17:00 PM PST

    I am both sorry and glad. Sorry for the loss, and very, very happy that she did get to see the people she loved.
    Happy and healthy New Year wishes are wending your way.

    ReplyDelete
  5. Diane J StandifordJanuary 1, 2013 at 6:46:00 PM PST

    Nice post. I agree, hospice is a Godsend. It is how I hope to leave. I had just been pondering how people say, "They had a good long life." Never a good short life or a bad long life, while certainly both are lived and both leave us a tad amazed. A long life well lived, how marvelous!

    ReplyDelete

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